Grumpy

I woke up grumpy this morning. My alarm went off about 6:30am. I wanted it to shut off on its own. I didn’t want to drop my arm along the side of my bed to the floor where my cell lay. (I’m getting married in 10 days and therefore I’m lacking furniture.) And I’m lacking joy, not because I’m getting married. No, I love the man I’m marrying and I couldn’t be more than happy. But, this morning I woke up grumpy. Grumpy because I was not rested. Grumpy because I wanted to get up at 6:30am if not earlier and work out. Grumpy because after I worked out I wanted to go to Grounds for Celebration, drink coffee and drink deeply from the Word of God…something that I am in great need of. Working out didn’t matter much, but not getting up to spend time with the Lord irritated me. So, therefore I’m grumpy. At times I laugh about it. At other times I cry.

You see…God brought Ben and I together. Ben and I fit perfectly together. The Lord has mended our hearts together and given us each other. Which is the second best gift that we could receive, second to God giving Jesus Christ to us to set me free from sin and give me the hope of eternal life.

I don’t spend time with God in order to pay him back, and yet I do in the same. I am indebted to Him, He is my Master. What an amazing Master He is. No other master on earth will bless me as much as God does and has. No other master on earth will meet my needs as God does and has. No other master on earth will give His son up for me as God has. For those reasons, and a million more along those lines, I want to devote my life to getting to know the Creator that knit me together in my mother’s womb, as David once said in the Psalms.

This is why I’m grumpy. I had it in my mind that I would spend time with the Lord this morning, and I was too tired. I don’t like excuses. Yes, I can and will do it tonight, but I’m in wedding planning mode and my brain is on “Go” mode so it’s harder to focus. The morning just brings a peace and ease to my heart that the evening doesn’t. So,
I woke up grumpy this morning.